The Manzo Kids – No Talent, No Goals, No Future

Wow!  Have you ever read the tweets these kids put out?  They are some nasty peices of work.  Even still, RHOcomix will treat them with respect and refrain from profanity or untoward judgement.  I think the title is harsh enough..lol.

By special request of Jeannie, here’s the Manzo kids….

Milania Has a Christmas Wish for One and All

Even funny people have “inside sources”.  We got a call from someone who sounded a lot like Milania.  (not really we didn’t hear from anyone.  I just find the whole “inside source”/news scoop thing ridic). And she had the sweetest message for all her fans in cybersphere.  (not really, I have no clue if she has a holiday message or what that message would be).  But if she did call us to share her christmas wish, we hope it would go something like this…

Oh Come On…. She Lost a Jetski FGS!

I thank The Gorgas, Laurita’s and Manzo’s for the comic relief during this difficult post-storm time.   Hearing the self importance in Melissa’s voice talking to ET about her Jetski and lack of electricity was just plain funny.  Irritating, but funny.  So here’s my ode to the Idiots on The Shore.

PS: it goes without saying RHOCOMIX will only donate to nationally recognized charities.  And I suggest the same for everyone. Has nothing to do with how much one likes a person.  It’s just good policy.

OK.. enough serious…

Geez, I Think It’s Time to Get the Frick off Joe Giudice’s Back

Man, Joe Giudice…. (sigh)  How do I put this in as few words as possible.  I don’t know Joe Giudice, but I know first generation Italian families.  I married into one.  I’m not italian but as my husband told his mother the night he brought me home to meet her for the first time “ma, she gets a little italian every night”.. lol.  (eyeroll)   I have six uncles named Joe, Joey, Little Joey, Joey Nines, Vinny and Pete.  And four Aunts named Ann, Joanne, Josephine & Annette.  So I know the type of man who would leap tall buildings for his daughters and put his wife on a pedestal while at the same time need his ego stroked once in a while and isn’t immune to saying “shut the fuck up” on occasion.   Not my husband of course.  If he said that, I’d kick his ass.

So let’s give this guy a frickin break, huh

Wishing Seasons Tidings to Teresa and her Family

After catching a few minutes of the “Lost Episode” I was so happy to see Season 4 come to an end.  I felt compelled to commemorate the event with a short comix strip to wish Teresa and her family a happy holiday season.  And to the rest of the staff, as the strip says may God have mercy on your soul.  Redemption is always possible.

PS: This isn’t about who’s right who’s wrong.  This isn’t about who hurt who’s feelings.  This is about a 22 episode (41 if you count Season 3) pounding on one cast member.  Just not cool.

Honey Boo Boo Schools Melissa in the Truth

And you know how much Melissa loves the truth…  Honey Boo Boo is typically a firecracker, but always light hearted in her attempt to share her views.  Let’s see how she did with RHONJ interloper Melissa Gorga.

Hmm… ok, So Honey Boo Boo doesn’t seem to like Melissa.  I wonder why?  lol.  Even Honey Boo Boo can knows the smell of deceit.

RHONJ Used To Be Fun Until S3 Came Along

No one can deny that families can be difficult, but no one expects them to air their dysfunctions on national TV.

At first I was certain Teresa’s brother, wife and cousin joined the show with inertia knowledge and blessing.  Part of the semi-scripted style that makes the shows such fun for some of us: finding the bad edits, the frankenbytes and sub-themes taken out of context.  But after S3E2 I realized Teresa had no clue.

As the online blogs grew exponentially so did the divide amongst viewers.   The Internet has always been that anonymous place where unhappy people could troll comment boards and create mayhem and increase the hate at will.  With RHONJ it was hard to tell if People really felt so strongly or if this was trolling at its worst.

Luckily many of us, our lives otherwise occupied and time at our hands made blogs like this one to pass along a little positivitey.  Others started blogs to get the truth out.  These women were great researchers.  Their life situations had left them time to make use of their prodigious skills.  One in particular became a virtual meeting place for people who liked Teresa, who thought less of her SIL Melissa and reveled in reading behind the scenes “really real reality”.

Comments would number in the 1000s.  But that site, like many were hobby sites.  Something to occupy our minds while our productive lives were on hiatus.  When babies were born or cared for loved ones died, they stopped watching and went back to real life.  I can only speak for myself to say, I was comforted by the people who commented and seeing them day after day.

We focused on the new villains, putting their lives under a microscope.  Season 3 promised to be dramatic.  If nothing else, we’d learn a lot about Teresa’s family.

al at once it became clear, whatever was happening on air, behind the scenes the mamzos had won a second place in the race to the bottom.  And Caroline wasn’t happy – not one little bit.

jer only pride could be taken in her being hated less than Melissa and much less than Teresa’s cousin, Kathy (not my bff).

For us in the audience wh watched with open eyes the season was filled with lessons.  How the humble join a show hoping for 15 minutes.   But end up with red light fever.  Shamelessly following every suggestion of their producers. We got to see how truly ugly people could be when the light shines brighter on one and nt the other.   

The Story of Five Women From New Jersey or F#&K You Caroline

In your mind think of Charlie from Charlie’s Angels….hear the theme song as he says, “there was once five girls from New Jersey…… All different in so many ways.

After graduating from the School of big hayeh and longggg nails, they settled down had children and doted on their husbands.”

Such a wonderful group of frenemies. That is until bravo got hold of them….then we see an already delicate peace shatter into a million pieces.

We all know the major story arc by now, each show has a villain. This show had Caroline. But um… I’m not sure she was acting.

All that’s clear since S1 is that she’s a two faced jealous woman whose sister Dina has left the show and her sister in law hides under her skirt for fear the only true outsider, Daniele Staub will decide to spill the dirt.

Caroline didn’t like Danielle Staub, so she had ta go.  Too bad we kinda liked her faux gangstah-real strippah vibe.  We kinda like Vinny Pro – well Kathleen didn’t, but I did.  Remembrance me?  Rho.   But most of all – and this is for real, I loved her daughters.  So did Kath.  But not Caroline.  Dis choe is fa my fambly.  And Bing!   Danielle gets the old kick in the arsh…

So for her daughters sake alone we’re glad she said f u caroline and birded her way west.

But caroline had another axe to grind.  This one in her own fambly.  Sweet zen, Dina.  Got-ta go.  She knows the rules.  She’s running amuck…. Gotta go.  But she wasn’t really running amuck, she was just too damn pretty.  Bing!  Dina is kicked to the curve.  Reunion of S1 showed us just how creepy Caroline could be.   Fake cry, fake cry, “…..what u did to my fambly”.  Oh marone a mi.   Well, it’s only semi scripted, lol.

So two gone…..who is next on her hit list.     I’ll give you three guesses first two don’t count.  Now it could be the ho from the flo of the disco in Reno .. I mean Vegas but it didn’t rhythm.  But I’m guessing it’s sweet Teresa who truly bugs sweet Caroline.

Which we find to be true in Season 3.   But what happened, behind the camera, that caused such obvious animosity?

We know about RHONY’s Bethenny’s success in skinny alky amd “having it all”.  The bravo franchises became a platform for success.   What was initially a peek behind the gates of the truly rich, a few years later became , on screen, a horror show of women fighting and acting a bitch.  Off camera they were approached by sponsors of products and ideas.  In Bethenny”s case she already her an idea.  She also had a hunger for self-promotion which served her well and provided a template to RHONJ.

Could this be what happened to Caroline’s beloved extended fambly?  Did Teresa get to the trough through moxie and guile.  Did sponsors love her toddlers and Gia while American women looked at their own juicy Joe and knew the love of family was as American as apple pie – or gravy ,aide in season by women with no moon?  In either case, it would be this funny woman and her happy brood who would make viewers laugh and smile; expand our hearts just a little.  So perhaps next season we’ll see Teresa be next to say, f u Caroline.   But we’d have to stay tuned.

 

It’s The Teresa Show – um…like, duh

When we see the eye rolls complaining of the attention Teresa is getting, we just have ta laff.   By we I mean me, Rho and my BFF Kathleen .  We’ve been watching RHONJ since it came on the air and waited until now to post a blog.

why?  Cos there was nothing that excited us enough to blog about.

and our mothers always said. ” if yaz got nuttin’ ta say, say nuttin”

so we”z did just dat.  But then…..oh marone…  Imma hand the keyboard to Kathleen   Just a sec..

Hey everyone out there on bravo land   Hahahaha.  Ok so where do Rho leave off.   Oh marone!

So S3 of RHONJ starts and we see this trampy couple  – yup, Melissa and Joe.    They came on so strong, and they worked so hard to make the look bad.  It backfired on em.

Melissa’s sisters are an embarrassment, poor Joey seems like a good boy gone had.  But most of all we felt for Teresa.

Now we know more than most. We know it’s mostly scripted, we k ow how the producers stir the pot, etc. etc.  we thought yaz know this could be a true Italian opera.  These peeps got real issues, they don’t need to producers buzzin around.

So we decided to blog about to it to laugh .  To remind viewers and the famblies of the hilarity of it all.  Cos contrived or not, feelins are gonna get hurt .  If youz Italian u know I’m right.

So that’s it…we hope to make ya laugh and bring smiles to yout lives.  If we do or don’t, let us know in the comment section below.

 

RHO Comix

Man, this season on RHONJ was very difficult to watch.  It made me wistful for the days of Danielle Staub being hounded and bullied for no apparent reason other than the Manzo’s are theives.. I mean thick.. i mean thick as thieves, thick as thieves.

What better way to laugh than to find something funny in these tragically flawed people.  Come on, let’s laugh.

Teresa will be OK without us.  ;). She knows we got her back.